Invasion of "The Swap" People

Happy Sunday, Midlands Babywearers!

It's been two weeks since the last post, I am so sorry that time has gotten away from me. I hope to make this one fantastic to make up for last week's missing post. Last night, I posted this in our Facebook group, and I love it so much, I'm posting here, too.
"You are a Master Babywearer - in China, it is said that "A master is anyone who knows more than you do." So, you are all master babywearers compared with most of the moms in the world. You do NOT need to know everything there is to know about babywearing -- if you know even ONE carry with even ONE type of carrier, you are in possession of knowledge other moms desperately want -- even if they do not yet know they want it. ;-D Therefore, you should all feel confident enough to teach others! So, pick a public place, pick a day of the week, and start sharing your skills with other families." -www.wearyourbaby.org
This is what Babywearers of the Midlands is all about. Parents helping other parents on their parenting journeys: sharing our skills, our knowledge, our failures AND our successes. It doesn't matter whether your only experience is with a Baby Bjorn, or if you've tried a little of everything, you have valuable knowledge to share both in our group and in our wider community. I'll be honest. I've never even tried ON a Baby Bjorn or similar narrow based carrier. My husband did, when we were expecting our first, and it looked like a baby bra on his 6'6" frame. We laughed, and moved on. Those of you that have used a Baby Bjorn (or similar narrow based carrier), I'm sure have ways to make it more comfortable for you and babe, and are perhaps the best resource for others looking to branch out from that type of carrier. Don't be afraid to speak up and share your stories. We love hearing from each and every one of you.

 

The Swap.

It's a scary place, the first time you go look. I'm sure you've heard horror stories. Failed transactions. Abbreviations. New language. Rules. It's like a whole 'nother country there. And I'm not even exaggerating. BUT. It's one of the best places to find a used carrier for the money you want to spend, plus, you are helping another mama out, right? I'm going to try to break it down for you, both as a seller and a buyer. How to navigate it, the lingo, tips and tricks for selling quickly, and buying right.

Buyers

Before you do anything else, even look, you need a feedback link. Go find the group "Babywearing Swap Feedback" and ask to join. Someone will add you usually within 24-48 hours. Once you are in, you need to be on a regular computer to create an album, not mobile. Choose a picture, it doesn't have to be your profile picture, just one you like, of YOU, and create an album with it, titled with "Feedback for YOUR NAME HERE."

Once you've created and titled the album, link under it in comments any buyer/seller feedback you have from other sites. www.diaperswappers.com, www.babywearer.com, www.etsy.com, www.ebaby.com, you get the idea. If you have NO feedback, anywhere, that's ok too. Just say so, in your album comments. Everyone has to start somewhere. Once you've created that feedback album, SAVE that link in a document somewhere, or if you are like me, and always mobile, send it to your phone, too. It can be difficult to search for albums, as that group is very, very large.

Okay, now that you've created a feedback link, you can go browse the swap. It helps to read the rules first, that will give you a general idea of the feel of things (but I really recommend doing that in any buy/sell/trade group you join). The carriers are listed in albums. Woven wraps by size, other carriers by types, miscellaneous items (you will find babywearing coats, accessories, etc here), and the Bargain Carrier album (everything $100 or less, usually including shipping). Some people, like me, are always mobile and will post to the wall. Wall listings are active for a few days before they must be moved to an album or deleted. 

You've found a pretty carrier! But the listing is like a foreign language - what do you do? Take a deep breath, I will parse out some common abbreviations and terms. The seller should list the brand, colorway, and size. Brands could be Didymos - abbreviated Didy. Kokadi is KKD, Kinderpack is KP, Little Frog is LF, you can find a link of common abbreviations, HERE. Next should be colorway. If it is Didymos, one of the oldest and most common/popular brands, there is a specific logic to the abbreviation. PHI, LHI, NLI, BWI - these are all Indios - that's the weaving pattern and the last letter of the abbreviations. The first letter is the color (in order  - Petrol, Lila, Natural, Blue or Black). Except in the case of the all cotton Indios, the second letter is the fiber blend. H is for Hemp, L is for Linen. In the case of all cotton, the second letter is the second color, often W for White. if you see more abbreviations, do not be afraid of Google. Google is your friend.

Price. Say the price listed is $130PPD or MMAO. What's that mean? PPD is "postage paid domestic" or basically, shipping included. Nearly everything is supposed to shipped priority, with tracking and insurance on The Swap. You've noticed, I'm sure, that these are not the cheapest baby items.  You want to be protected as much as possible in a sale. MMAO = Make Me An Offer. MMARO is Make Me A Reasonable Offer. Honestly, unless listed "price is firm", it is always okay to negotiate. Do it by private message. Like any negotiation, be nice. Don't say: "$500?! are you crazy? I can buy that retail for $198 plus shipping here! another mama is selling for $150! Would you take $125?"  Just cut to the chase and say something like:  " I love that Indio you are selling! I see it's listed for $200, would you consider taking $180?". Feel free to add in sentimental bits, like it's something you've been looking for a long time (ISO = In Search Of. DISO = Desperately In Search Of, CISO = Casually In Search Of, VDISO = Very Desperately In Search Of), or the perfect color to go with your daughter's eyes. I'm serious, sometimes that seems to help. The worst the seller can say is NO, or possibly counter offer. The albums are refreshed every month, so offers towards the end of the month stand a really good chance of being accepted, so that the seller doesn't have to relist in a fresh album next month.

Other questions to ask the seller: when do you ship? are there any stains or flaws? can you measure that for me? How does it fit your baby? do you have any other pictures (action shots, different lighting, etc)? Would you describe this carrier as good for hot weather? cold? Is it difficult to care for?

A brief word about "FTO or For Trade Only" - generally a seller/trader wants something of equal value, but sometimes you will see listed "+/- PP as needed" meaning they will entertain trades of differing value. Say they have an Ergo, and want a Tula. This means they'd trade the Ergo, and add the difference needed in Paypal money to fund the Tula someone else may offer in trade.  Or maybe the seller tried an expensive wrap, and actually misses a certain one of lesser value. So will trade their Pavo for an Indio, and the person with the Indio will also send the difference in value of Paypal money to the owner of the Pavo. Some traders want a "paypal backed trade" meaning you send the carrier PLUS the trade value in Paypal, as insurance, and both parties refund the money once the carriers are received as described. This is the most protected way to trade, but many people trade because they don't have the money to buy. If you are comfortable trading, go for it. (disclosure: I've never done a Paypal backed trade. I've always been very happy just trading).

What if you want something more expensive than you can afford in one go? Some sellers will accept payment plans. Make sure you lay out the terms in detail via private message. Usually a non refundable deposit, and regular payments until it is paid off. I've done my share as both buyer and seller, and love that there are people out there to help me afford what I want. Now, many times these payments are a mix of gifted and goods (so the seller is not hit with excessive fees). If you prefer the security of sending money as goods, perhaps offer to cover the extra fees the seller would incur.

So, the seller accepts your offer. Great! Make sure you either ask for their Paypal address or give them yours to invoice you, as soon as you are sure. The general rule is that the first person to ask for the paypal address is the buyer (or asks for an invoice). Always send money as goods so both of you are protected. There are fees for the seller this way, but that should be built into the cost they ask. (sometimes carriers will be listed as $130 ALL IN, instead of PPD to reflect that). They should give you a tracking number as soon as they ship.

Fluffy Mail!
Once you get the carrier, before you use it even once, look it over for stains, flaws, anything out of the ordinary. There is a great post here about common flaws and how to fix them. Most are cosmetic and should have been disclosed in the listing. If you find something glaring, take a picture and message the seller. Mostly as an FYI. If it is something you can't live with, or makes the carrier unsafe, it is perfectly OK to ask for a refund and send the carrier back to her. If she refuses, then a Paypal dispute should be opened. BUT - 99% of the time, that will not be necessary.  One other thing you may want to do, if it is a woven wrap, is measure it. STIH - Soft Tape In Hand (this is a cloth measuring tape, in case you have not guessed) - along one rail, to make sure the size is roughly what you were sold. This is the most glaring error I've seen happen to buyers lately, is getting a different size than listed. It's not off by a couple inches (often wraps shrink a couple inches washing, that is no big deal), but by a foot or more. You can ask for a refund or sell it yourself to fund the size you actually want. I will say that in the majority of cases, you get what you asked for and everything looks great! Happy Wearing!

This is a link to Babywearing 102's Swap Etiquette document. They do not recommend negotiation, but I think it is fine, as long as it's done politely, and by private message.

Selling

So, maybe your first carrier didn't work quite right for you, or your baby has outgrown it. You want to sell it. Good news: baby carriers retain more of their value than nearly any other baby gear item I can think of. Here's what you need to list your carrier:

A picture.

You want a clear picture, in good light, of your carrier. Bonus points for creating a collage (there are many smartphone apps that make it easy). For wraps, it helps to have action shots as well as one of the wrap neatly folded or rolled up. If you want your picture to be click-bait, having a daddy-wearing pic is always pretty awesome.  If there are any flaws (pulls, loose threads, stains, fading) take a close up picture using something as reference. This is often why you will see a coin or other item on a carrier, as a reference size showing the size of the flaw. (other reasons you see items on a carrier are to compare/contrast the color) - these pictures can be included in the comments. I recommend doing this rather than having potential buyers private message you for pictures, as it makes everything public, and you won't be answering a dozen PMs asking for the same information.

Price.

 How much to ask for your carrier is a sensitive topic. It's a very personal algorithm that often includes how much you paid for it, how much you will pay in shipping, if it is a high demand (HSA = highly sought after or HTF = Hard To Find. ETF = Easy to Find) carrier, if it is OOAK (one of a kind), sentimental value, condition, etc. In general, you can ship most things priority within the US for $10 or less. Often it helps to include in your listing (because the swap is international) that you will cover a portion of shipping elsewhere, or add $X for shipping, or to have a potential buyer message you for a shipping quote.  There are relatively common carriers that sell for close to retail if they are in excellent condition (no pulls, flaws, etc) but are well broken in (often linen and hemp blends), because it does take time and effort to achieve that state of wrapping floppiness. If you do not know what the original retail value for your wrap was, it might be listed on the woven wraps database, or you can try googling. If all else fails, you can ask on the group Babywearing 102 on Facebook.

 

Listing.

Include as much information as you can, including everything reasonable that went into your price - like condition (EUC = Excellent Used Condition, VGUC = Very Good Used Condition, Like New or BNIB = Brand New In Box), color, fiber, how broken it is, why you like it, and why you are selling (if it didn't work for you or if your child outgrew it). Your life story is not needed, and it does not seem to help sell a carrier any faster, I'm sorry to say. Remember, this is a public forum and all the financial details of your life do not need to be on display. I only include this disclaimer, because you DO see postings like that, and that is not the best way to sell your carrier. DO include if you have pets, if there are smokers in your home, etc. It also helps to include when you will be able to ship. We are all moms, we all have kids, we KNOW you may not be able to get to the post office every day, and not everyone can print postage at home. Putting a time frame in there (e.g.: I ship on Wednesdays and Saturdays) will help answer questions. Be honest! The more information you include about the carrier itself, the more likely it will sell quickly with little fuss, and the person who does buy it will be happy because there are no surprises upon receipt.

Lastly: include your feedback link. Once a carrier is received and everyone is satisfied, please leave feedback both as a buyer and a seller.

These guidelines also apply in any carrier B/S/T group. There is Babywearing on a Budget and also some manufacture specific ones (Kinderpack has one, as well as Kokadi, Pavo, some of the other hand-woven wraps, and if you dare, there is a High-end Babywearing Swap you can search for)

Happy Buying, Selling, and Trading! If you have any questions, need help troubleshooting, or have other tips and tricks to share, come join the conversation in our Facebook group.

Upcoming Meetings:

This Thursday, the 27th at 10:00 join us at the LDS church on Broad River Rd to learn more about Babywearing on a Budget.
 Saturday, April 5th, at 10:00 a.m., we will be at the LDS building on Assembly Street in downtown Columbia. The topic: Babywearing Dads. We will have dads talk about the carriers they love, and why. Bring the men in your life to this family friendly meeting!
Thursday, April 24th, at our weekday location, we will take about warm weather babywearing, including wearing in the water.
Saturday April 26th is the Natural Baby Expo/Great Cloth Diaper Change. We will be there, with a table to answer questions, meet new parents, and help spread the babywearing love!

We look forward to seeing everyone at one (or more!) of these events, and the play dates that are sure to be sprinkled in between as the weather warms up.